Alas, my writings.

So many cute potential post titles, so little time.

Apparently I never wrote about Avenue Q. I can't believe that. I really can't. I just went back through the posts on here and I never seem to have posted about it. I posted about Spamalot, which is what I was probably confusing it with... but I never posted about Avenue Q. (Actually, I'm going to check again. Hold on.)

Nope, never did. Alright then: Avenue Q is the best musical I've probably ever seen, and it's the best time I've had at the theatre for as long as I can remember. It's the only show I can ever remember going to twice (I went for the second time yesterday evening, hence the sudden wonder did-I-post-about-it) and it's definitely the only musical that's actually made me almost - not quite, but almost - weep with joy.

It's that good.

I won't go on much about it, but it's the 'sweary puppet show', 'South Park meets Sesame Street'. You've probably heard about it. A sort of mix of Rent and The Muppet Show, but not shit. That part is crucial. It is instead innovative, exciting, uplifting, insightful and best of all... hugely funny and massive amounts of FUN.

It's been playing in London since last summer, and it's booking through until January 2008 right now. Warning: the original cast has changed slightly once, but the original cast members (including the trio who play the major parts) are all departing on December 1st, so I hear like the dork I am. So for God's sake, go soon.

What's the most famous movie you've never seen? 
Submitted by Mike.

I have seen most of the 'big' ones. But of course it depends on your criteria for famous, right? Sorry to be a pedant, but that's who I am. So, take the American Film Institute's 100 'greatest' movies list; here's the Top 10:

1. Citizen Kane (1941) - Seen, like
   
2. Casablanca (1942) - Seen, love
   
3. The Godfather (1972) - Seen, love
   
4. Gone with the Wind (1939) - Not seen...
   
5. Lawrence of Arabia (1962) - Seen some of, but BY GOD it's a struggle
   
6. The Wizard of Oz (1939) - Seen, like
   
7. The Graduate (1967) - Seen... overrated
   
8. On the Waterfront (1954) - Not seen
   
9. Schindler's List (1993) - Seen... yeah, good
   
10. Singin' in the Rain (1952) - Not seen

So from that list I guess Gone With The Wind is the biggie.

This makes me think about fairly frequent conversations Amanda and I have when we're picking through the DVD collection to decide what we might want to watch 'of an evening'. I'll suggest something and she'll say she hasn't seen it, which will lead to me incredulously yelling in a high-pitched voice:

"Whaaaaaat? What do you mean, you haven't seen Back to the Future Part II?"

(Or Part III. True story.)

This is usually followed by me saying I haven't seen something like Il Postino or Easter Parade or something else that's subtitled, foreign or old, and her having the exact same reaction.

I guess it just goes to show, what some people feel is essential viewing doesn't make sense to the other person.

What are your Superbowl plans?  What's your prediction and why? 
Submitted by danatmedog.

This is totally a Cliff answer, and I know it's late, but I can't pass it up:

1. Go to sleep
2. I'll probably have a good night's rest
3. Because I have a comfy bed and a lovely wife to sleep next to.

America: THERE ARE COUNTRIES OUTSIDE OF YOUR BORDERS. SOME OF WHICH YOU ARE YET TO INVADE.

Have you ever met any celebrities? Any interesting stories?
Submitted by Tasha.

Depends on what you define as 'celebrity' - and indeed, what you define as 'met' - but I've spoken to the following through various jobs. In other words, I've had interview-driven conversations with them, not just spoken to them for a minute or two as they passed me in a corridor or signed an autograph for me:

Christian Bale, promoting Reign of Fire (the game): Cannot remember what he said - great story, Stephen! However I do distinctly remember that when I met him, after filming had finished I believe, he still looked exactly like his character in the movie, and also spoke in the same 'Sarf Lahndan' accent that he had in the film. Which has led me to wonder, is he that method that he adopts his character when doing interviews? Never managed to confirm or deny that.

Bruce Payne, promoting the (shudder) Dungeons & Dragons movie: I was asked by the-then producer of AOL Live to go talk to this guy, because I'd been expressing a lot of interest in the D&D movie over the months before it was released, for my sins. Originally I was supposed to interview the director, but after the movie opened and totally tanked, they switched him out for Mr Payne, who played the villain. It was a lucky break for me, because after I saw the flick, I envisioned sitting with the director for an hour going "So, er... your film... umm...." Anyway, Bruce Payne was very soft-spoken, really quite funny, self-deprecating and very smart. He totally knew he was typecast playing villains but hey! He played 'em well.

Anthony Daniels, AKA C-3PO from Star Wars, promoting Star Wars Episode I: We paid Mr Daniels a substantial amount of cash to do some Threepio-style 'you've got mail' WAV files, and as part of the deal (as I recall) we got an interview out of him. Unlike most guests he came to the office to do it, and the channel producer allowed me to sit with him and conduct the interview, which basically meant typing his responses to questions that came in from members.

Two things I distinctly remember. One, he was sarcastic as hell, but not in a denigrating way. He'd obviously had some questions asked of him a million times, and my favourite response was to the inevitable "Was it hot in the C-3PO suit?" question, to which he said "Well, I was wearing a full rubber body suit, and some heavy fibreglass armour over the top, walking around in the desert... so what do you think?" And then sweetly, he asked if there was some way I could show the member that he was joking with them - so yes, I taught C-3PO how to do a winking emoticon: ;)

Second, he was really quite humble. This needs some backstory: not long before he did the interview he'd been the 'MC' at the first ever official Star Wars convention, Celebration. At that show I'd read that the weather had been awful, and due to some planning screw-ups, several hundred fans ended up queuing in heavy rain waiting to get into the main hall. Mr Daniels, according to many eye-witnesses, went outside and walked up and down for several hours talking to fans, making them feel welcome and so on.

Now during the interview, I can't remember why, but I mentioned that I'd read about this and that I'd read a lot of praise for what he did from fans that had been there. Obviously not a message board lurker, he seemed genuinely touched that people would be happy he did that, and quite surprised, too. I guess he thought what he did was just the right thing to do - but it was very touching to see he wasn't big-headed about it.

Les Dennis, who was doing panto when I was doing work experience on a Bournemouth paper: He was nice. Quiet. This was years and years before his Celebrity Big Brother 'notoriety' and at the time, I happened to know he was a big film fan (he'd been interviewed in Empire mag) so we talked quite a bit about that. Hell, the alternative topic of conversation was too depressing.

Several bands, including (ahem) Yes, most of Ocean Colour Scene (no lead singer), Toploader and Jazzie B of Soul II Soul. With the exception of Jazzie B, I'm afraid I have to report they all acted, to a greater or lesser degree, like a bunch of wankers when I met them... typical pop star diva stuff. But I'll gloss over that....

And best of all, of course... Bruce Campbell, promoting one of several Evil Dead games: Ah yes. The Man. Definitely a hero of mine, which of course means I have no interesting story about him at all. He was professional, nice, and pretty much as cool as I expected.

Finally, I've also sort of spoken with Neil Gaiman over IM, but for a man of words, it was underwhelming, to be honest.

I guess I did have some stories after all.

What word(s) do you always make a typo in?

I can't tell usually because Word corrects them so fast. That's good! And bad.

I used to have real problems spelling 'guaranteed' and 'rhythm'. For a while I had to tell myself the first one in my head phonetically, or I'd spell it wrong; now that just happens by reflex (for the record: 'goo-wah-ran-teed').

I had to spell 'rhythm' in a round of Cranium at Christmas, and of course I hesitated. It's the two h's, you see. Does something to my spelling memory. I hesitated long enough to get a chorus of "Come on" from my family, but then I got it right; I was much more proud than people would understand.

I know it's not exactly original to say this, and I also know I'm sounding so much like my father right now that it's scary...

... but how can anyone think of Big Brother as entertainment?

Amanda's got it on in the other room. She has a much higher tolerance for reality shows than I do. All I've listened to in the past five minutes is Jade Goody scream abuse at another member of the house. Cast. Whatever.

Why is this regarded as entertaining? We might as well broadcast random muggings or spousal abuse marathons. Just because we've decided that these people are supposed to be 'celebrities', does that make it better?

I know this is the dullest subject in the history of dull subject, but... I just have no need of human misery as part of my primetime TV schedule.

We know you never slack off at work, but if you did, what would you do?

Assuming you work in some sort of modern office, where you stare pretty much at a screen all day, occasionally tapping on your keyboard and/or moving a mouse around, while not being watched at all times by your boss...

... hell, you're probably slacking off right now. Get back to work, you mangy cur.

As for me? I'd play games. Wait. That's part of my job. Crap.

Condorman (1981)

"Sure, most sequels stink, but what movie really needs a sequel?"

Disney's 1981 spy-superhero-spoof, Condorman. I will brook no argument.

They set it up for a sequel right at the end, dammit! I've been waiting 25 years!

/plug

By the way, I rant about this stuff in audio form on an almost weekly basis as part of Tagline: a movie podcast. You're welcome!

/end plug